A common mistake many couples make is waiting too long before seeking professional help when things go wrong. Sitting back hoping things will simply fix themselves runs the risk of one, or both, partners leaving the relationship for good.
At Northern Frontiers Counselling Cairns we understand that oftentimes the hardest part is admitting your relationship is in trouble and pinpointing exactly why. Amidst all the hurt, anger and frustration, it’s not easy to listen quietly to each other’s concerns and viewpoint. If we hear something that we don’t like we tend to stop listening and start building a defensive response. Then we fire it back at our partner causing conflict to escalate. If this happens again and again resentment grows…and love fades…
Listening for understanding is the key to improved communication…
Northern Frontiers Counselling Cairns’ senior counsellor, Melinda Bailey, has 20+ years counselling experience across a broad range of life issues. Melinda specialises in helping couples deal with a variety of marriage and relationship issues using a therapeutic model called Emotion Focused Couples Therapy. Partners are invited to consider what they need from each other to be content in the relationship – then learn how to ask for them to be met. When that happens we feel content and want to be around the person who is meeting our needs the way we need them met. Living too long with unmet needs however, causes us to experience a range of powerfully unpleasant emotions that eventually force us to consider going outside the relationship to satisfy them.
Northern Frontiers Counselling Cairns understands that an important part of relationship counselling is learning to how to listen for understanding. Most of us tend to assume we know what our partner needs. But unless you’ve actually sat down and asked your partner what they need from you then taken the time to listen carefully, you’re probably just making assumptions and acting on them. You might think you’re giving your partner what they need but unless you’ve heard it from them chances are you’ve missed the mark – and that can be frustrating for both of you.
Listening for understanding is the key to relationship repair…
What are our emotional needs?
Human emotional needs, such as Affection, Openness and Honesty, Sexual Fulfilment and so on…are our basic psychological driving forces. They may change throughout our life span, but they don’t change overnight – and they always demand to be met to our individual satisfaction. At Northern Frontiers our Relationship Counselling service teaches you how to ask respectfully for what you need from each other. Understanding and meeting each other’s needs is a vital part of relationship repair work.
Relationship health depends on how well each partner’s needs are being met…
The process for commencing marriage and relationship counselling at Northern Frontiers Counselling Cairns is outlined below. It begins with individual Intake Sessions that enable the Counsellor to assess each partner’s readiness to speak openly and honestly in a joint session.
The process is as follows:
Intake & Assessment with Partner 1
15-20 minutes via phone – $40.00
Intake & Assessment with Partner 2
15-20 minutes via phone – $40.00
Joint Relationship Counselling Session
50 minute session (phone/video-chat or in-person) – $130.00
Relationship Counselling can only involve joint sessions when both partners feel comfortable speaking openly and honestly in each other’s presence and the counsellor assesses it as appropriate. Prior to a joint session the counsellor must speak privately with each partner for 15-20 minutes via phone. This is your opportunity to provide background information and outline the issues you wish to discuss. Intake calls cost $40 each. Joint sessions are charged at $130.00 for 50 minutes. Longer sessions are available by prior arrangement.
Joint sessions can be conducted in-person at our Cairns North office or via phone/video-chat (FaceTime, Skype etc). Either partner may request a 50-minute individual session (fee is $95.00) at any stage of the relationship counselling process.
Appointments available from 7.00am weekdays and from 8.00am Sundays.
Flexible Appointment Times:
For your convenience Northern Frontiers offers appointments from 7.00am – 4pm weekdays and from 8:30am Sundays – which means there’s no need to disrupt your work/life schedule. Out of hours appointments tend to fill fast so please book early to avoid disappointment. Simply call 1300 90 81 70 or email: firstname.lastname@example.org
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75 Digger St,
Cairns North QLD 4870
Mobile: 0419 531 269 (text messaging available)
LiveChat: If you have any questions about our services and don't have time to ring or email, feel free to use the LiveChat function (bottom right of this page).
Mon-Fri: 8:00 am – 5:00 pm
Sunday: 8:00 am - 1:00 pm